Bullied Part V


Stephanie DonaldWe’ve examined some possible reasons for bullying in our society except one that goes back to a very old warning that came from the generation of my grandparents and great-grandparents: Television is not a babysitter.

In this day and age, actually, the problem goes much, much deeper. Nowadays we have all sorts of electronic babysitters. We’ve got the internet, cell phones, video games and when you couple these with the added economic pressures that parents have it equates to almost no time they spend with their kids.

This problem started way back in my generation when my parents wanted to go out for a “night on the town” and my father figured that putting a TV in my bedroom would make me feel like an adult but at the same time keep me occupied while he and my mother went out and got shit-faced for 9 hours and left me home by myself at 9 years-old.

In the 1950s and 1960s parents spent 60 hours or more per week with their children. In the 1970s that number had dropped to 10 hours per week.

Now, in the 21st century, parents spend 4 minutes or less per week with their children.

Is it possible to impart your values, wisdom and morality in 62.4 hours in your entire child’s life? At 4 minutes per week over 18 years until they’re an adult that’s exactly how much time an average parent has to give their child every bit of wisdom they know.

My research uncovered these facts; I’m not making them up. Some parents might in fact spend a lot more time with their kids and probably do but for every parent who spends more time with their child there seems to be thousands of parents who either refuse to or can’t because of work obligations, school obligations or both.

The other facts I uncovered are even more disturbing but most psychiatrists are only “hinting” at the connection at this particular moment in history.

First, a recent study conducted by Harvard Medical concluded that (surprise, surprise!) bullies derive an almost “sexual” satisfaction from torturing other people. The comment from the researchers (who obviously had never been the victims of being bullied) was the biggest surprise to me because they expressed “shock” at discovering this reaction. They actually expected to find that bullies derived no reaction one way or the other from the suffering of others.

In cross-referencing these responses with the Harvard study, the unspoken issue that all the psychiatrists and psychologists haven’t said yet is that pleasure derived from the suffering of others is a classic symptom of sociopathic behavior.

I have yet to see a study done on the subject but is sociopathic psychosis a product of pathology or environment?

From purely an observation standpoint of today’s society and without any clinical research to back up this theory; I would have to say that perhaps the pleasure derived from sociopathic behavior might possibly be related to learned condition response.

So far in my writings in LGBT-Today I’ve had to stick pretty much to layman’s terms and not go into my ancient training in clinical psychology but the deeper I dig into the mind of bullies the more heavily I must rely upon that training from many years ago.

Since the education system of today is so lacking it might be necessary for me to “teach class” here to explain the meaning of “conditioned response”.

In the 19th and early 20th century at the University of Saint Petersburg in Russia, Dr. Ivan Pavlov, a Professor of physiology, attempted an experiment using dogs in a kennel. He would have assistants stand nearby with food bowls and then ring a bell and present the dogs with their food. This experiment became famously known as “Pavlov’s Dogs”.

After a short period of time the dogs would only have to hear the bell ring and they began salivating. He did the experiment over and over with control groups of dogs between 1891 and 1903 before presenting his results to an international symposium of physiologists and psychiatrists. Among those in attendance was Dr. Carl Jung, one of two famous pioneers of human psychiatry along with Dr. Sigmund Freud.

Dr. Jung theorized that these principles could easily be applied to human beings under the right circumstances and might actually be accountable for certain responses in human psychology.

Class dismissed!

Is it possible that under the right set of circumstances that a normal child could be subjected to “goading” to participate in activities that would bring pain and suffering to another human being and through positive reinforcement by their peers could begin to experience a Pavlovian response and stimulus to the act of causing harm to another human being?

I would have to say that the answer is most definitely “yes”.

After an extended period of time and experience inflicting harm on others then seeing the victim react would actually have an almost drug-like reaction in the bully’s brain chemistry.

Psychiatrists already know that mass-murderers and sociopaths derive a release of endorphins from committing acts of violence so it’s safe to assume that bullies would eventually begin to derive the same endorphin release from their own form of torture.

The danger of this situation is that almost every brain that becomes hooked on these endorphins starts to crave a higher release almost like a drug addiction so the forms of bullying become more and more violent and the amount of harm inflicted on the person requires them to become so brutal that they won’t be satisfied until they either murder the person or cause them to commit suicide.

I have browsed YouTube and although I have a group on Facebook called “Zero Tolerance for Bullying” even I won’t post some of the videos I found on there of high schools bullies dancing and drinking beer in celebration of the suicide they pushed a fellow student into to.

It doesn’t take a college degree to understand that is sociopathic behavior.

It’s also no wonder that children are seeking attention from other sources besides their parents. Apathy among all ages of society is so rampant that a user on my Facebook group, “Zero Tolerance for Bullying” wanted to leave the group simply because it “flooded her page” with useful posts about teen suicides and stories about bullying and she’d rather hear about her date for Friday.

I’d call that pathetic.

Yes, I do tend to be rather acerbic at times and I do speak my mind. I don't make apologies for being this way being sometimes do need a kick in the pants to get to get moving. Some people tend to think that I'm attacking my own audience but if they don’t want to hear the truth then as a teacher I had in high school used to say, “don’t let the door hit you in the ass on your way out!”

I have neither the time nor the patience for people who would rather take up arms in favor of “Save the Rubber Duck” or being more interested in where their next piece of ass comes from over saving the life of a teenager whether that teen is gay or straight.

Focus and prioritize, folks! You can always make another rubber duck and the bar will be there next Friday or Saturday. We’re talking about a human life and once that particular person is dead then they will never grace our presence again, ever! They deserve the opportunity to enjoy life.

The problem of bullying is not new but it has become steadily worse and will continue to grow worse until we take drastic (not baby steps and not nods until the problem takes out your baby sister or a cousin) measures to stop it here and now!

America has become a nation that refuses to do anything about a problem until it walks up, rings the doorbell, and kicks them in the balls.

Reality TV, video games, the internet and all forms of media have desensitized the population to look at a horrible issue and nudge their mate and say, “isn’t that horrible?” Then they hit the button on the remote control and watch Survivor.

But when they find their own child in a bathtub with their wrists cut and find a suicide note and had no idea that their child was being bullied to death then its boo-hoo, why didn’t she tell us? Then they want to go out and talk to every high school student in America about bullying because THEY lost their child.

Where were they before it happened? Where were they before when they could have stopped it?

When they talk to other parents about the problem where are those parents on the issue and why aren’t they doing anything about it?

Apathy; just like the girl who wants to resign from my Facebook group because it floods her page with useful information that interferes with her ability to monitor her date.

Stephanie Donald

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